I tried to log into my bank account online a few days ago and an error message popped up saying that my account was "suspended" and I should call customer service. After speaking with several useless representatives I was told that by an only slightly less useless representative who told me that I had to fax a notarized letter stating my current location. Because it is 1989.
I asked why this was necessary and she told me that it is because I am in a "high risk country." I asked what on earth that meant, why Turkey is considered high risk. It is just for compliance purposes, she told me, unable to elaborate. Oh, well that clears it right up. Of course, compliance purposes.
So I spent the next rainy day going to a notary, having the notary tell me that he couldn't stamp anything unless there was an officially stamped Turkish translation on the flip side of the page, going to the translator and falling asleep in her office chair while she took 45 minutes to translate a few sentences, going back to the notary and listening to his rant about how America is the most ruthless country trying to ruin Turkey. He walked off and I paid his ditsy flirty headscarved secretary with a 100 lira note and she didn't have change so called him back and he gave me a twenty from his pocket. The American doesn't leave without taking money, eh? He guffawed. You just charged me 80 liras for a rubber stamp and I'm robbing the Turkish nation because I ask for change? I didn't say, instead just nodded haha. America is the most ruthless country, he reminded me. Then his secretary asked me how she could improve her English and warned me that the stationary shop across the street was a real rip-off. I went there anyway and they were nice but the fax didn't go through; 2 hours later, after 9am New York time, it was finally sent.
Then, a few hours later, I got a convoluted email from Marcia at the bank office actually in charge of handling "compliance issues"; though she didn't even acknowledge receiving my fax, Marcia told me I needed a letter notarized at a US embassy if I was abroad. Apparently, the bank does not believe either my signed statement or that Republic of Turkey-accredited notaries are in fact located in the country of Turkey. I hope that the US consulate rather than embassy (where Marcia told me I must go) is an acceptable witness to my being in the country; Ankara does not seem like a particularly appealing travel destination these days.
So today I'm off to the consulate way up north in Istinye. The problem is that I entered Turkey with my Iranian passport, so the US consulate may also lack sufficient evidence that I am, in fact, in Turkey, and be unable to notarize my claim that such is the case.
I learned from Marcia that this is all because when in Iran I logged into my online banking account to check my balance. I didn't transfer any money to Iran, just checked my balance and logged out. Apparently that is a sanctions violation--and it must be a serious one if the nuclear deal didn't legalize it. Weren't Republicans making a big deal out of the Iranian government being able to pour money into Hezbollah and the Assad regime with its assets unfrozen by the deal? I guess the only thing bulwark left to protect American interests in the Middle East against the mad mullahs is that the latter aren't allowed to check the account balances for those unfrozen assets.
Before I go to the consulate, here is a review of the ways they could have detected that I am in Turkey and not Iran, if they had really dug deep into their detective work:
1) If they could trace my computer's IP address to Iran 2 weeks ago to know to block my account, they can trace my IP address to Turkey now
2) I called them, confirmed my identity by providing my card and PIN and address and last four digits of my social security number, and then told them I am in Turkey
3) I wrote them a notarized letter stating "I am currently in Istanbul, Turkey"
4) That notarized letter bore seals from Turkish translation and notary services and was stamped with the name ISTANBUL in large letters
I asked why this was necessary and she told me that it is because I am in a "high risk country." I asked what on earth that meant, why Turkey is considered high risk. It is just for compliance purposes, she told me, unable to elaborate. Oh, well that clears it right up. Of course, compliance purposes.
So I spent the next rainy day going to a notary, having the notary tell me that he couldn't stamp anything unless there was an officially stamped Turkish translation on the flip side of the page, going to the translator and falling asleep in her office chair while she took 45 minutes to translate a few sentences, going back to the notary and listening to his rant about how America is the most ruthless country trying to ruin Turkey. He walked off and I paid his ditsy flirty headscarved secretary with a 100 lira note and she didn't have change so called him back and he gave me a twenty from his pocket. The American doesn't leave without taking money, eh? He guffawed. You just charged me 80 liras for a rubber stamp and I'm robbing the Turkish nation because I ask for change? I didn't say, instead just nodded haha. America is the most ruthless country, he reminded me. Then his secretary asked me how she could improve her English and warned me that the stationary shop across the street was a real rip-off. I went there anyway and they were nice but the fax didn't go through; 2 hours later, after 9am New York time, it was finally sent.
Then, a few hours later, I got a convoluted email from Marcia at the bank office actually in charge of handling "compliance issues"; though she didn't even acknowledge receiving my fax, Marcia told me I needed a letter notarized at a US embassy if I was abroad. Apparently, the bank does not believe either my signed statement or that Republic of Turkey-accredited notaries are in fact located in the country of Turkey. I hope that the US consulate rather than embassy (where Marcia told me I must go) is an acceptable witness to my being in the country; Ankara does not seem like a particularly appealing travel destination these days.
So today I'm off to the consulate way up north in Istinye. The problem is that I entered Turkey with my Iranian passport, so the US consulate may also lack sufficient evidence that I am, in fact, in Turkey, and be unable to notarize my claim that such is the case.
I learned from Marcia that this is all because when in Iran I logged into my online banking account to check my balance. I didn't transfer any money to Iran, just checked my balance and logged out. Apparently that is a sanctions violation--and it must be a serious one if the nuclear deal didn't legalize it. Weren't Republicans making a big deal out of the Iranian government being able to pour money into Hezbollah and the Assad regime with its assets unfrozen by the deal? I guess the only thing bulwark left to protect American interests in the Middle East against the mad mullahs is that the latter aren't allowed to check the account balances for those unfrozen assets.
Before I go to the consulate, here is a review of the ways they could have detected that I am in Turkey and not Iran, if they had really dug deep into their detective work:
1) If they could trace my computer's IP address to Iran 2 weeks ago to know to block my account, they can trace my IP address to Turkey now
2) I called them, confirmed my identity by providing my card and PIN and address and last four digits of my social security number, and then told them I am in Turkey
3) I wrote them a notarized letter stating "I am currently in Istanbul, Turkey"
4) That notarized letter bore seals from Turkish translation and notary services and was stamped with the name ISTANBUL in large letters
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