man spa

I went to a fancy pool/sauna with one of the karaoke guys and two of his friends last night. All three are rich young businessmen in shiny suits and it occurred to me as we changed that I look like a fucking peasant next to them in my cheap shalwar kameez and kafiyeh.
For about $10 per person we got a huge pool, two water slides, jacuzzi, steam room, sauna (which they call dry room--they refer to the whole place as sauna), kiddy pool (which one of our number, who couldn't swim and didn't trust the strap then kept coming loose on the orange life vest he borrowed, prefer but was kicked out of), and a clever rubberized bracelet with a metal iButton that opened a personal locker.
They seemed to know half the people there (FYI the average weight of Afghans as in most of the world--with the US as an exception--is positively correlated to their wealth) but at the echoing poolside my Persian comprehension fell to about 3% and I returned to the sauna several times because that was the only place I could understand the conversation (the pace of conversation also seemed to slow in there). I've found that once you start trying to socialize in foreign countries the some of the first slang you learn is the expression to be bored (here "degh avardan"--I have no idea was "degh" means by itself -- google translate says "percussion") because everybody is worried that you aren't having fun. Upstairs after swimming we ate mediocre overpriced shwarmas (my impression is that there is absolutely no correlation between the price and either tastiness or healthiness of food in this country) in a room with less echo where I could participate more and join in joke telling. A new one I heard:
An Afghan goes to the US for the first time and when he comes back his friends ask him was he thought of the place. It's such a developed country, he replies, Even little children can speak English.
My story went over well about how when I first went to Tehran I quickly learned the shared taxi system: you shouted your destination as the taxi passed and if going your way it stopped for you. But I was puzzled that whenever a prospective taxi rider called out "mostaqim" he/she was picked up. So I took out my city map and looked all over for Mostaqim Square, wondering why all the taxis went there. Mostaqim means straight ahead.
As most who become friendly do they made fun of me for my Iranian accept. You sound like the BBC, one said, "Good evening, this is London," he mimicked sing-song girly Farsi. ouch.
We got back to the locker room and one of the new friends showed me that he had 15 missed calls from family on his phone and a text from his sister saying that they were all very worried. He called back and was dressed down for not telling them of his plans beforehand--here when you don't pick up your phone people assume the worst, he told me.


This climate doesn't make sense. It's so dry and dusty yet fruits and mosquitos thrive like few places I've been. I've been slapping 10-20 mosquitos daily and sprayed my room and the bathroom with some very toxic stuff that didn't seem to put a dent in their population. I do however  recommend the 3M ultrathon repellent lotion I've discovered on this trip.